Loser

When you think you've understood everything, but it only got worse. You try to fix things, but it backfires - it's like you accidentally hit "restart" on the most vulnerable version of yourself. And now you're standing in the middle of scattered feelings, like after a party where no one cleaned up. Pride is somewhere under the table, self-irony is on the windowsill, and hope is actually in the stairwell, waiting to be called back. But there's a strange warmth in this confusion. Because it means it's still alive, it's still being felt. Even if I took a wrong turn again, I messed everything up again. Sometimes being a "loser" is the only way to stay true to yourself.